Goop , if you ’re not already cognisant , is the " life-style brand " have and promoted by Gwyneth Paltrow . For backcloth , it won theworst pseudoscience of the twelvemonth laurels , 2017 , after selling jade green nut to insert into your " yoni " ( aka " vagina " ) .

Goop usually shows up in the news every now and then after set in motion some Modern unscientific folderal .

to begin with this yr , for representative , it advertise aDIY enema kitso that you’re able to safely squirt burnt umber into your anus .

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For just $ 135 you could actually grease one’s palms an " Implant O - Rama System At - Home Coffee Enema " promoted by award - winning actor Gwyneth Paltrow . What times we inhabit in .

With products like that , you ’d intend they ’d be beyond parody , but no .

Botnik Studiosis a squad that take on Bible from real websites , script , and other texts and then habituate them as bases for new prognosticative textual matter keyboards . They have turned their attention to Goop and created a parody site , and it ’s brilliant .

They feast schoolbook from Goop ’s website into their app , made a predictive school text keyboard using the ( bizarre ) comment , and out amount Goob .

The lampoon is pitch perfect , properly from the welcome message from Gwyneth :

" booster , I thought of your hands today , and invariably settle you do n’t have any . Not enough anyway . As I looked at my hands this month , I was deep impressed . For me , it ’s hard not to concentrate on them because they are young than the eternal rest of me .

I encourage you to bump your own hand even if they have gotten lost . Once you locate your hands again , bribe the thing that will have you forget your tegument .

Your infant , Gwyneth "

The parenting advice is also passably much straight out of Goop itself . " Brooklyn Crinkle " , a wellness advisor make by predictive text , writes in reply to someone whose baby wo n’t sleep :

" only , prove parenting transition tonics . Not only do they detoxify your gut and mind , they are also full of alcohol to assist you sleep well . Tonics work great for baby too ! Make a champagne cacao charmer for your baby and turn on the cooking stove . Then , let yourself shop for vintage bedroom pillows . "

But our preferent part is definitely the form of address of Goob ’s health article , include " Listen to your body : your migraines are podcasts adjudicate to be produced " .

ascertain out the full Goob parodyhere , or   Botnik ’s other parody ,   like their bot - produced versions ofFire and FuryandHarry Potter .